How Far We’ve Come

By Matchbox Twenty.

Posted in My Music | Leave a comment

Rejection

One of my least favourite words in the dictionary, most likely because of how much of it happens to so many people on an alarmingly frequent basis.  You’ll undoubtedly notice something different about my posts.  Even as I type this one, I can feel things within changing.  I guess we have to see where it goes.  Right now my guess it back to the starting line.  Back to the life I kind of had 8 years ago.  It’s a strange thought, returning to the beginning, rejecting what this life currently is in favour of starting over.

All of the misadventures have been for…for what?

Posted in My Thoughts | Leave a comment

To Live and Die in L.A.

By Wang Chung.

Posted in My Music | Leave a comment

Dr Seuss Quote

I like this quote by Dr Seuss.

“Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.”

It’s so true.  Whether the moment is good or bad, the value isn’t always apparent until after it’s passed.

Posted in My Quotes | Leave a comment

One Year Later (Part 4)

One year ago, I attended an event called bid night.

I had no idea what I was getting myself into.  I didn’t know the world of pain that lay ahead of me.  I didn’t know the self-doubt and constant feelings of not being good enough that were in my way.  I didn’t know that joining (or trying to join) a sorority (for the 3rd time- that should have been a tip-off) would cause so much harm to my already diminished self-respect and self-esteem.

I didn’t know that they’d make me doubt everything about myself and call my character into question.  That had never happened before, and, quite honestly, there was never any reason to call it into question, even a year ago.

I also didn’t know just how good friends could get.  I didn’t know that friends could care about me as much as I cared about them.  I didn’t know that I’d soon be making some of the best friends I’d ever had and that they were part of a fraternity in which I’d soon find something of a niche.

And I didn’t know what the future had in store.  I still don’t, but at least what I DO know is that it was a valuable experience and that the things that came of it have made me a stronger person.  I DO know that eventually things will be okay and the future will continue to exist. 

Posted in My Thoughts | Leave a comment

World Pangolin Day

Today is World Pangolin Day.  http://pangolins.org/world-pangolin-day/

I didn’t know that when I posted yesterday.  SO!  Happy world pangolin day!  These adorable animals are in danger of extinction because people eat them and illegally traffic them across Africa and Asia.  They’re mammals with hard plates made of keratin on their backs and eat ants with their tongues, which are longer than their bodies.  They’re also very cute.

Source: http://pangolins.org/

Yesterday’s post: https://therealgi.wordpress.com/2015/02/20/pangolin/

Posted in My Thoughts | Leave a comment

Revisions (The Broken Heart’s Truth)

For my poetry class, we had to do a series of revisions on our poems.  This is mine for one poem that I wrote during December last.  You can see how my own views have changed based solely on the tone change.  I like this revising thing.  I should do revisions more often.

[Untitled Poem]  (Draft 1)

I can be happy or I can be sad
It really makes no difference
For the world will continue on its own
And I will be forced to endure either way.
My heart often aches and my soul grows lonely
As I sit here and think about all that could have been
My heart cries scarlet tears
And I think about what will never be.
It’s the most painful thing I can do yet I don’t have any choice
For every part of me wants to take it back
Wants back what I once had.
The future used to exist and I desperately want that back
But I know that it’s not meant to be right now.
Sometimes I think it wasn’t meant to be and I hate myself for thinking it
But sometimes I wonder if it was meant to be…ever.

[Untitled Poem]   (Draft 2)

I can be happy or distraught
But it really makes no difference to you
For your world will continue on its own
And I will be forced to endure mine either way.
My heart often aches, my soul grows lonely
My spirit is broken as I sit here and reflect.
My poor heart cries scarlet tears when no one’s watching
And I’m thinking about what will never be.
It’s the most painful thing I can do. I have no choice
Yet every part of me wants to take it back
And wants back what I once had, what we once had.
The future used to exist but then vanished
I know it’s not meant to be right now, nor tomorrow nor after.
I hated myself for thinking it
But I wondered if it was meant to be…
__________________________Ever.

[Untitled Poem]   (Draft 3)

Happy or distraught makes no difference
For your world will continue and mine I will endure.
My heart aches, my soul grows lonely,
And a broken spirit is all that remains for company
As I sit and reflect with a tortured mind.
My heart cries scarlet tears when nobody is watching
And I am forced to think of what will never be.
Such pain! Such pain I have not felt, but I have no choice
Despite wanting to take it back
Despite wanting what I once had, what we once had.
The future existed and vanished
But now I look back and realize it wasn’t meant to be
Not today nor tomorrow nor the week after.
I know it wasn’t meant to be…
_____________________Never.

The Broken Heart’s Truth   (Draft 4)

Happy or distraught, it makes no difference
For your world will continue and mine I will endure.
My heart aches, my soul grows lonely
And a broken spirit is the only company
As I sit and reflect with my tortured mind.
My hear cries scarlet tears when nobody is watching
And I am forced to think of what will never be.
Such pain! Such pain I have not felt, but I have no choice
Despite wanting to take it back and despite wanting what I once had
What we once had.
The future existed then vanished in an instant
But now I look back and realize it wasn’t meant to be
Not today nor tomorrow nor a week later.
I know it wasn’t meant to be…
_____________________Never.

Posted in My Writings | Leave a comment